All right peeps,
In answer to last weeks question, "What was that Chris blokes surname from The Really Wild Show?", I have been reliably informed by three people that it is Packahm. Or similar.
Three answered, but the prize goes to Eddie, with his remarkable response time of 3 minutes. So mate, you win, when I get back, a big sloppy kiss on the mouth (tongues optional).
I'm in Bangkok, leaving tommorow. Went to the cinema, which was actually better than any other cinema I've ever been in, but not by much. And you did have to stand up to show respect to the King, for about two minutes!! After the first minute I was really wondering how much respect the guy needs, what with him being king and therefore already having a fair bit. Plus it was to music, and a rather cringeworthy photo presentation of the King talking to Thai people, the King walking in the jungle, the King pausing to pick a flower, the King checking out birds with his binoculars (the kind with wings).... all very The Waltons.
We went to Pat Pong the other night..... for those not in the know it's like the red light district in Amsterdam, but with all good taste and morality removed. It's basically an open air market, with go-go bars, restaurants, and sex shows going on in the buildings... Now as you know, I'm not one for watching girls in bikinis gyrating around a pole for hours, but the beer was cheaper in the go-go bars than the restaurants, so whaddaya expect?
Also, when you're with a girlfriend the girls don't come up to you and say "Me love you long time ten dollar". They DO however say that to the 65 year old man with the wedding ring sat next to me, and then it becomes extremely funny to listen to the following conversation. But after a while you do get bikini overload.... particulary when there was about 20 customers and over 40 girls wondering around. Rather odd, I thought, but such is life.
And there's these great touts that line the road, running up to you with lamintated (Laminated!!) card menus offering you shows for about a tenner that involve, but are by no means exclusive to, ping pong shows, banana chopping shows, cigarette smoking shows and large object shows. I, being of sound mind and pure soul, tried to explain to them that in the Western world things like ping pong and chopping yellow fruit were basic skills, and did not often draw a crowd. Smoking, I reasoned, was something people did in the street for God's sake, and we hardly ever charge to let people watch us!
The next man, who had a menu with colour photos, explained my error.
Anyway, we left all that debauchery behind us and strolled around the corner. I was a little worse for wear (as is the custom), and walked straight into an elephant. Now, I know what you're thinking - how can a man, even a drunk man, walk into an elephant without noticing it? Well it was like this - Firstly, it was quite a small elephant. Secondly, it was dark and the elephant was dark. And thirdly, it's not the sort of thing you expect to find in the street at half one in the morning.... Well it isn't, is it?
So then we fed the elephant for a bit, and stroked it and stuff. All rather surreal.
We're leaving tommorow. Off to Cambodia, the place of temples, friendly faces, beautiful, untouched scenery, unexploded ordenance and a bloke who will let you blow up a cow with a bazooka for 50 dollars.
Mmmmmm............ bazooka.
Keep up with the loving people...... remember that where ever you are, and whatever you do, somewhere, sometime, there's a cow exploding with a rather startled "Moooooooo".
Me love you long time.
Ten dollar.
Mike.
January
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Bangkok, Thailand
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2025-02-06