What do you get when you put 3500 people into a confined space, and 2500 of them are above the age of 65? You get 500 people with mobility issues, another 500 that are cranky, and 1500 that are complete germaphobes...and 200 of the passengers MIGHT fit into ALL THREE of those categories! Oh, and then, of course, there are the remaining 1000 that are below the age of 65. But they’re pretty boring!
I overheard this conversation on my way into the buffet this morning...Elderly Passenger to the crew member working the buffet line: “Excuse me...you might want to change that spoon over there. I just saw a woman lick her finger and then touch the spoon.”
And then there’s our dinner neighbours, the twisted sisters Elvira and Joanne. They are always good for a laugh or 2. Yesterday it was when I saw them returning from some sort of excursion they were on when in Falmouth and Elvira was dragging a huge suitcase with her. WTF? Did she take that out with her? Or did she buy it on her way back? And if she did buy it, why did she need it? It’s the Caribbean! What amount of shopping can one do here that would require an additional suitcase? A huge one at that! People are funny.
Tonight we enjoyed a nice quiet dinner in their absence. We do traditional dining, so we sit at the same table in the same dining room at the same time every night. We like it. It’s great for people that like consistency. As we were leaving the dining room at about 6:45, the twisted sisters were just arriving...for dinner...for the 5:30 seating. No surprise, since they think the ship revolves around them.
But the last laugh of the day was mine. We decided to take in The Beatlemaniacs this evening at 8pm. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what the show was about. Plus it was being hyped all week by the Cruise Director staff. I got there 45 minutes early and snagged front row seats. The theatre was filling up already. By 7:45 there was barely a seat left in the place. Needless to say that when the twisted sisters strolled in at 7:59 and circled the entire theatre, there was not a seat left for them. And surprisingly, no one gave up their seats. If that doesn’t tell the sisters that the ship doesn’t revolve around them, nothing will!