The life of a bacon picker

Wednesday, October 02, 2019
Funchal, Madeira, Portugal
It’s not an easy life, being a bacon picker.  Now, don’t get me wrong...it’s not hard like potato picking, or strawberry picking, and nowhere near as tough as picking cotton.  But here on the cruise ship, it’s a very popular job.  There are many folks onboard who have adopted this role.  It’s not gender specific.  
                                                     
You don’t get to wear a uniform which distinguishes you from all the ‘non bacon pickers’.  But no worries...you WILL stand out. Other’s will recognize you for what you are.
The hours aren’t particularly long either.  They are mainly from around 7 am to 10 am, so basically during the breakfast rush.  
There’s no monetary pay for the job, but you will be compensated with dirty looks, deep and loud sighs, and the occasional expletive which will be hard to hear because it’s been murmured under someone’s breath.  That someone will be standing in the long line forming behind you while you slowly and methodically pick...through...the...large...tray...of...bacon...for...that...one...piece...that...is... perfectly... cooked.
Personally, I am at a total loss as to why this particular job is so heavily staffed on this particular ship.  I could almost understand it if this was a ship that the bacon was only lightly cooked...or even medium cooked.  But on this particular ship, the bacon is nearly cremated.  It is so over cooked that it just crumbles when it’s touched with the serving tongs.  You don’t actually GET an entire strip of bacon.  You only get a bunch of small bits and pieces.  But still, the professional bacon picker has to comb through the entire tray of bacon looking for that perfect little 3 inch piece.  Just the one...oh...but maybe there’s a second one in there equally perfect.  They’ll just look a little bit longer.  No one will mind...will they?
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2020-08-05