Day 1

Sunday, November 22, 2020
Pape'ete, Windward Islands, French Polynesia
Oh.
La.
La. 
Spinning. 
if I had written this coming off the plane, you would have received a much more “ooh ahh” post. But unfortunately the short walk from the plane to the terminal was all I got of Pape’ete before sunset. 
Free WiFi for 30min- customs takes 30min. Done. Get some money money and find a taxi. Awesome cool strong woman driving the taxi, of course I hand her an equivalent of $100 bill and she gets upset (Tahitian upset so like pretty much just jokes about it) and says even in the States you don’t do that. Tbh I felt bad and I tipped her which made her even more happy than she already was and advised me that no more tipping in Tahiti. I said ok but keep the tip. I later realized it was a 30% tip which is unheard of in the land of the français. Oh well. I give zero shits about giving a bit of extra cash to a cool person versus the French government. 
French Polynesian. French. Ughhh I don’t want my money to go to France. For many reasons this was a good place to come for this trip, but even the fraction of a percent of my money that would actually land in Macron’s pocket made me seriously consider not coming. It’s a weird time.
Spinning. 
I thought I was just being weird when the plane landed. I couldn’t shake the feeling of motion even when I could see we were 100% stationary. I still can’t think about it too much. My stomach churns. Of course I had a headache from the plane and singular glass of wine. But this continues to me entering the Fare (house). Walking in, all sweaty and tired, sees everyone in swimsuits having a cookout and I dumbly say “hello” and dart my eyes everywhere looking for social queues on the next move. Not only had I forgotten 1. How to say hello in French but 2. Every capability on how to be a normal socialized human (thanks 2020). All I said next was “sorry” (my German colleagues would kill me) and walked on with absolutely no end destination as I did not know the grounds at all. Luckily the girl I ran into was very patient and kind, and asked if I was Mary. She directed me to my room where I plopped down my backpack that was now half sweat and my tote which I think is about to snap from the constant massive weight of my spaceship computer. I take a shower to try to feel more normal. It works for a second, and then I hear the French outside again. Shit. I feel so many Lille feelings come back for some reason- I’ve been to France a million times since then and that’s what comes back. Sitting at a table using every ounce of energy to decipher what these people you so desperately need as friends are saying. Getting yelled at for not pronouncing “ketchup” correctly. Walking through what felt like an entire high school of the coolest most stylish most intimidating French smoking tweens on my way to school everyday. Add memories to the spinning. 
I pop outside to try to redeem some social reputation I so quickly shot down with my first impression. 2 guys my age (or a year or two older- not that we actually look the same age; they’re way cooler and more French) and a girl, Charlotte, same deal with the age. And there’s one old guy with no shirt but his large sunset tattoo across his belly almost makes up for the lack of covering. And he’s got the surfer necklace and all. Very funny. 
They’re all cooking up a meal with smells incredible but of course I turn down offers cuz I’m American. I felt like I was imposing anyways, even if just for my rocky French. It was lamb with zucchini- wtf France. I friggin missed you. I miss food like this. We’re all chillen talking and the big challenge has manifested itself. Survive (and thrive) in a French conversation over a meal amongst those who are already friends. Oof. My brain worked and worked and I know it can do better and on less energy, but I was done I think. It’s been so long!! SO. MUCH. FRENCH. Add rusty second language to the spinning. 
I finally excuse myself for sleep and so here I lie writing a melodramatic trio entry. I have taken two Advil and have set no alarm so hopefully my spinning can stop by the time I wake up.
I’m so SO happy it’s 80° and humid. Nice thing about travelling by yourself- no AC if you don’t want it. I do not plan on touching my AC for the entire trip (:

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2025-02-09

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