I went into Rayong, the next town, (think Scranton) the other day to buy a web cam for Skype. I bought some roll on Passion (deodorant), saw some White Glamour (body wash with whitening agents, everybody wants to be white around here) which will give me 'admired skin'. Haven't seen any great t-shirts yet but I did see "Good girls go to shopping"  and "Soft, gentle moonbeans." 

Tomorrow I will go to the Happy Pretty Beauty Salon and get my nails done. It's right next to the Love Happen Bridal Shop. Near my hotel I can rent a cheap 'rest room' with fan for 350 baht.

At dinner in Bangkok, I was offered Chicken Phak. I searched my brain - phak, phak, I know this word, I think it's a green leafy vegatable on the order of morning glories - "yes," I say.   "Chicken Phak ?" the girl asks again. "Yes" I say again. "Chic KEN O Phak?"  she enunciates as clearly as a Thai can. "Oh, Chicken, not pork," I reply.

I asked the taxi driver to find me a good hotel. "Yes, yes, yes" he says, and the glint in his eyes says kickback.
"How much?" 
"1000 Baht." 
"Clean hotel,"  I emphasize.
He appears not to understand, so I break into charades. I hold my nose and say "Not stinky."
 "Stinky, 1000 baht;   "Not stinky, 2000 baht,"   he replies.
Either he's the most honest tout in the business, or he has no idea what I just said.