So after spending 11 days in Antigua, Guatemala (about 7 more than we wanted, but hey, I needed my check card!), Lyndi and I took a chicken bus to Guatemala City, and then hopped on a pretty nice bus to Rio Dulce. The ride was nice, we even got to watch 2 movies: "I am Legend" ("Soy la Leyendo"), and "Rambo" ("Rambo"). Once we arrived at Rio Dulce, located on Lago de Izabal, we were bombarded with "helpers", wanting us to stay at their particular place, showing us pictures, haggling prices, and giving the "evil eye" to their competitors right next to them. But now Lyndi and I were seasoned travellers, hardened to the busy haggling and constant pressure of these barnacles, clinging to you as if to say "these 2 are mine, back off!". So after fighting off all of them with the machetes we had bought in Honduras, we walked to the dock where the boats ("lanchas") pick up travellers. Unfortunately, once we got to the dock, we realized that we didn't have the number to Casa Perico, the place where we were staying. Luckily, one of the "helpers" (he had survived our lethal machete skills ) had followed us to the dock, and called Casa Perico on his cell phone to come pick us up. And how much did that cost us???? Absolutely nothing, as it turns out, Casa Perico payed the guy a couple Quetzals, we jumped in the lancha, and we were on our way.

Arriving at Casa Perico gave you the feeling that you were on a trek down the Amazon river, surrounded by jungle on both sides, tree roots stabbing their way into the water from the riverbanks, while vines hung down from the branches . Casa Perico was located on the other side of the lake, and in a little river inlet that took you into a "junglesque" territory of Lago de Izabal. The entire hostel had literally been built half on the river, half in the jungle, with decks leading you everywhere- to the main thatch roof bungalow where the game area and bar were, to the lodgings, set deeper back in the jungle. Our plan was to stay at Casa Perico for 2 days only, and then take off on an adventure to a remote place called Oasis Chiyu. 

Our stay at Casa Perico was nice, we kayaked (Kayak'd? Kayak'ed???), swam on the docks, and played darts and cards on the main deck with other travellers. Since we were in the jungle, or "quasi- jungle", the wildlife was incredible. We got some great pictures of a green tree frog, and a giant beetle with some psychedelic colors on its back. What we didn't get a picture of, probably because i was paralyzed in fear, was the Brazilian Bird Tarantula that decided to prop himself about 1 foot from the head of our bed we were sleeping in . But don't worry, Bruno (one of 3 Swiss that owned Casa Perico), assured us that it was "just a junior", and was more interested in insects and birds than humans. Ooookaaaay. We still "ushered" him out of our room and into the wild where he could enjoy all the insects and little birds he wanted. What I wondered though, as I lay in bed not being able to sleep now, was "how did a Brazilian Bird Tarantula end up all the way in Guatemala? Did he take the train? Did he hitchhike? Was he just travelling north for the summer to meditate and find his inner chi?" These were questions I didn't get to ask and unfortunately will never know... 

Okay, so now came the real adventure. So far, Lyndi and I had pretty much mapped things out, i.e. where we were going, what bus line to take, when we would get there, etc. But now we were presented with a problem. We had discovered Oasis Chiyu on a message board in Antigua, stating things like "come see the real guatemala", and "travel off the beaten path" . Between those catchy phrases, and the beautiful pictures that were on the laminted advertisement, we were hooked. "Yeah!" we said as we started fantasizing about this beautiful, untapped resource, off the "gringo trail" that so many backpackers followed. In addition to this ethereal high we were getting from travelling off the beaten path, was the excitement of how we were going to get there. Because there were absolutely no directions, no working phone numbers (i tried both), and the map was about as useful as a one legged man in a kicking contest. But that was okay, because we were a couple of badasses, who were going to MacGyver our way to this place. All we needed was a ball of twine, a piece of bubble gum, a plastic fork, and a minibus who knew where the hell Oasis Chiyu was. 

After chatting it up with the locals in Rio Dulce, we found out that no one really knew about this Oasis Chiyu place, but they did however, know how to get to Las Conchas . Score! So with this valuable gem of information, Lyndi and I jumped on a minibus (literally jumped on, they slow down to about 5mph sometimes), and headed to the small, one-machete town of Cadenas. On our way there, a guy named Carlos from Guatemala City struck up a conversation with us. No, we're not that good at Spanish yet, but luckily for us Carlos spoke Spanish, English, and a Mayan dialect called K'eck'chi. He was on his way to Cadenas to help out his brother with his local business for a couple of weeks. We traded off questions, Carlos asking where we were from, etc. and us asking questions about Guatemala, mainly the education system we had heard so much about. And not in a good way. Unfortunately, the government hasn't put too much into its education system, making empty promises during campaigning, only to follow through with the bare minimum. Statistics show that out of every 10 children that attend a school, only 3 are left by the 6th grade. The number of high school graduates is even less, and college- well, you get the idea. Although most of the school system is paid for, things like uniforms, lunches, books, school supplies- are not. And when you live in a country where the average income is about 1/8 of that in the US, yet a pound of chicken costs the same in both the US and Guatemala, money for these things tends to take the sidelines to things like food, shelter, and water. And to most families living in poverty (as Carlos' was when he was a kid), chosing between the two isn't that hard . It was after reading about this, and hearing Carlos explain other points, that we found it ironic that Carlos couldn't even get a job as a bus driver for the city, due to the fact that he didn't have a high school diploma. This trilingual, well-spoken, good-hearted man was rejected by the very government that put him in this situation in the first place. Anyway, I wish him and his family only the best. 

After an hour or so of chatting with Carlos, we arrived in Cadenas, said our goodbye's, and hopped on another minibus heading west towards Las Conchas. In contrast to the first road we took, which was paved, to say that this one was not was an understatement. Huge potholes and large rocks prohibited us from going over 20km most of the time; however the mere anticipation that we were getting close to our destination only made us enjoy the trip all the more. Finally, using our mad MacGyver skills, which consisted of an apple core, a piece of string, and a guy saying "hey, this is your stop for Las Conchas", we told the 15yr old driver to stop and let us out . Armed with our backpacks, we watched the bus take off in a cloud of smoke as we looked down a dirt road that ran perpendicular to our previous one. As it turns out, there were 2 guys sitting at a small wooden tienda on the corner, that knew where Oasis Chiyu was! Sweet! "how do we get there?" We asked in broken Spanish. We were given rough directions (right at the giant ceiba tree, left at la iglesia....), and were assured that it was only about 1km away. This was good considering we were walking with all our worldly possesions on our backs at 2pm in the afternoon in baking hot Guatemala.So 40 minutes and 4.5 kilometers later- we arrived at Oasis Chiyu (i still need to go back and give those guys distance lessons), and it was everything the pictures said it was. Big, thatch roofed house, open air, set right on the river, hell, they even had a pet duck! We stumbled in to be greeted by the owner and ex-philadelphia native, Felipe, his girlfriend Miho, and Mateo, a local from Las Conchas. Over the course of the next 15 minutes, we were enlightened as to why this place seemed to want guests, yet not want to tell them where the place was . Apparently the web site hadn't been updated in 3 YEARS, and the 2 "working" numbers, well, didn't work. But Felipe hadn't planned on running into 2 highly resourceful, smart, incredibly good-looking and talented people like us!

Still feeling the buzz from having navigated our way into uncharted (according to Felipe's internet map) territory, we stashed our bags and at Felipe's request, walked 50m to the river and jumped in. I'll tell you what. After walking almost 3 miles, uphill in the scortching hot heat, NOTHING felt as good as jumping in this river. There was a lagoon, surrounded by 2 waterfalls- one upstream and the other downstream, and the water was crystal clear. So Oasis Chiyu is completely off the grid. They use a pump to get their water directly from the river, and there is no electricity at all on the property- all fires and candles. Felipe was in the process of remodeling, and throughout our 2 days there, we couldn't help but feel that we were in the way. Ironically, against what the Lonely Planet said (you MUST make reservations), we were the only 2 people there. Probably because unless you have one tough mother of a carrier pidgeon, or can telepathically link yourself with Felipe, reservations are hard to make.For our one full day there, we decided to do the waterfall tour, which entails a 45 minute walk through dense "forest jungle" (best way I can describe it), followed by swimming and jumping off the 10m waterfalls, lunch at the base, then a trek back . After hours of Felipe boastin' the night before about how good of a tour guide he was, he decided to put his money where his mouth is.............and send us with his non-english speaking day laborer, Mateo. "but don't worry guys, me and Miho will come meet you for lunch at the falls!" Now don't get me wrong, Mateo turned out to be a hell of a guy, and did a great job navigating us on the tour, but once again, Lyndi and I couldn't help but feel we were in the way during Felipe's remodeling of Oasis Chiyu.

Again, since this place was off the grid, Miho would cook for us nightly, and it was all food grown from the property. She cooked vegetarian dishes that were incredible, from pasta and carrots with a garlic lime sauce, to fried rice with a peanut sauce. My hat's off to Miho.So at this point, regardless of the fact that we felt we were unwanted in a place that is supposed to want people (go figure), I'd say the score was about even on the recommend/not recommend scale . But Felipe was not one to let down...The final night we were there, amidst Felipe dominating 97% of the conversation with frequent self contradictions throughout, Lyndi and I asked on how we could get back to Sejux. Now keep in mind, the 4.5km walk that got us here actually started in a small town called Sejux, where the minibus dropped us off. From there it was about 4.1km to Las Conchas, and another .4km to Oasis Chiyu. So Lyndi and I would be damned if we were going to walk all the way back to catch our minibus. Our most logical idea was to ask if Felipe could take us in his truck down the road to Sejux, so we wouldn't have to walk. This is how the conversation went.... (our thoughts in parenthesis):

"So Felipe, do you think you could give us a ride to Sejux tomorrow when we leave?"

"Oh, gosh, i usually charge 60Q ($8US), but I can't do it for any less than 50Q ($7US)"

"Oh, wow. Why so much? Isn't it only like, 4-5km??"

"Yeah, but keep in mind, it takes me about 30 minutes to get down to Sejux, and then by the time i turn around.... and head back...."

"(30 minutes???? It only took us 40 minutes to walk it!)" we were both thinking..."

"....Plus guys, gas is so expensive right now.... remodeling this place.....oil prices going up.....9/11....about an hour round trip for me...."

"Oh, okay i guess, well what do you suggest we do?"

"Oh! you could walk up to Las Conchas (.4km- that he didn't even offer to drive), and catch a minibus from there to Sejux!"

"Okay, so how often do the minibuses come by Las Conchas?""Oh all the time man.""What, like every 15 min? 30min? Hour?"

"Man,oh, all the time man."

"Okay, well, goodnight Miho, goodnight Felipe (jerk)."

Sooooooooo, the next morning, Lyndi and I said our goodbyes to Miho, Mateo, and Felipe, who after last nights bout of blatant unhospitality, had the balls to give me some flyers to "hand out to people" on our journeys. We walked the .4km up to a little shed where the buses come by, and after 55 min of waiting, finally caught a bus to take us on the long, 4.1km, apparent 30min ride down to Sejux. So 3 minutes and 27seconds later (Oh yeah, I timed it), we hopped out the minibus, paid the driver 5 QUETZALS for BOTH of us, and waited for a minibus to take us back to Cadenas, en route to Flores and Tikal. By now, you probably can tell what Lyndi and I think of Oasis Chiyu. It was a beautiful place, set off the beaten path travelled so much by tourists, on a stunning river; unfortunately it was poorly ran by a guy who although he lived in Guatemala, just didn't get that concept of "Guatemalan Hospitality" that shone so brightly in all the other places we had visited so far. But, as the saying goes, "When God shuts a door in the form of a pot-smoking, self-contradicting, money rapist; he opens a window". In this case, the window was a 4X4 Toyota truck in Sejux, driven by a father, with his son, and his son's grandfather- 3 generations, who gave us a ride all the way back to Cadenas, and absolutely refused to take any money we tried to give them for the hour long ride. To make things even better, upon pulling up to Cadenas, we ran into Carlos again, and got to talk with him one more time before wishing him well and heading north, to visit the breathtaking ruins in Tikal.