"Residents shocked over underwear in elevator" The Star, 2013-Jan-4

[This item, from a round-up of foreign news, is quoted here in its entirety]

"Residents at Block 265 of Boon Lay Drive, Singapore were shocked when one of the elevators had underwear hanging inside, reported China Press. A university student living there said it was the first time he had seen the intimate apparel in the lift on Dec 31. It was reported that the 21-year-old, known only as Lew, had stepped inside the lift at about 3 pm, and was surprised at the sight of two hangers with underwear and bras hanging on the railing. He believed the owner had tried to air-dry the clothes in the elevator due to the wet weather."

I'm unclear whether Lew had not previously seen women's underwear in the lift on that particular day, or he had never seen women's underwear in the lift, or he had never seen women's underwear. His reaction would suggest that he had never seen women. Except in the last case, an appropriate comment would be one that my philosophy professor made many years ago: "You shock easy."

I refer the reader to the journalistic formula N = s/d^2 (newsworthiness = seriousness divided by distance squared)   This is the law that equates "200 000 left homeless by floods in Bangladesh" with "Five killed in helicopter crash in Texas" and "Man stabbed at bar in Montreal" and "Bloor Street closed during rush hour when streetcar jumps track."

Here are some other headlines that could have, but didn't make the same Malaysian newspaper that day.

"Dry cleaning negligence ruins suit in Sydney -- man forced to attend brother's wedding in borrowed garb"

"Terengganu schoolboy discovers hole in sock"

"Ipoh toddler needs new shoes, mother believes"

"KL woman puzzled by accumulation of husband's pocket lint -- police suspect foul play"